Shayne came to see us today; Chris decided to bring him onto campus, and of course, I was obviously overly-excited to see Shayne again.  I guess I was being a bit too quiet today... Dry throat (again) =___=" *coughs* Dang it~! That means I'm getting sick again! Dang stupid, WEAK immune system D:

Other than that, I guess I should've known; yet it was pretty amusing.

Right when we (Chris and me) introduced Shayne to Aries...let's just say we sort...of found out that they were complete opposites to everything you can imagine =___=" *sighs* Shayne hates Nike, Aries love Nike, Shayne hates boots, Aries love boots... You get my point? Horrible...yet it was amusing :)) Lol~! Horrible me :)

I swear, I think the guys were acting sooo weird when we began talking about Love.

Si, the so-delicate-and-sensitive topic of Love~! :O

But yahh :O I swear, when they were talking about the types of girls they like or would go for, I felt sooo suddenly uncomfortable =____=" Like... Idk! I think Aries think Chris/Shayne like me. Geez... She made everything so awkward for the "longest" moment between me and Chris two weeks ago before Thanksgiving Break :O Short story? She pretty much said that Chris and I should start dating because we're always together.

....=___=" NO FREAK-ING WAY.

Anyways, Shayne was being really friendly today :O

It was weird...after we talked about the kinds of people we'd date (except me), he just randomly told me to touch his shoes~ LOL! And poking my earrings and accompanying me to get my Starbucks... I don't know if I should be thinking weird as well =____="

Oh well.

I had fun today :D

Except for one part :O I SWEAR! THAT STUPID lecture! It SCARRED ME for LIFE TT___TT Who the heck would show students pictures of herpes and other STIs in such graphic, close-up images??? (I was so grossed out--weak--I could only go on for a couple pictures until I had to look down because lunch was after that stupid lecture.) I am scarred. I felt so dirty. I felt TAINTED~! =__=" Horrible, just horrible...

Random.

But yeah...it was weird.

....The day ended before I knew it. I really didn't want it to end. I wanted to stay with Shayne, Chris, and Aries for as long as I can...but I couldn't.

Time will always go forward, regardless of any thing, any person, any event.

Nothing can destroy time; nothing can reverse it either.

How's JJ? ~

I haven't texted him today.

I texted him yesterday and the day before, and the day before that.

He hasn't answered them, but those other days, he did.

I feel as though I'm always bothering him whenever I'm texting him in the morning or late at night with greetings such as "good morning" and etc....

So, I've stopped.

Idk...

Feelings are confusing, you know?

The whole time I was with Shayne and them; the weirdest feeling came over me. I just wanted to lie my head down by Him.

Other than that, I really don't know what to do with myself anymore.

I've finally come to the point where I really don't care if the person I like doesn't like me back.

There's really nothing you can do about it.

I've decided that even if I "like" that person, it's not enough for me.

I'm broken.

It doesn't change that, Friend.

I'm broken, so...what am I supposed to do?

I have all those stupid song tracks that only causes me pain; I have all these sad memories; I AVOID anyone who's from Yu Da's world because I just don't want to be hurt anymore... I'm scared of getting hurt so I laugh and neglect them.  I really hate them.

They cause nothing but pain.

So...now what?

Sometimes...I feel as though myself wasn't good enough. Like I needed someone to be physically there to lean on. Like I need a hug for every blow, for every hurt I receive...

I did a pretty good job, coming so far on my own.

...And what is up with the Class of 2011 this year? I don't know but geez, I find some people pretty irritating all of a sudden. Like Yun Hee. I used to like Yun Hee a lot but this year...she's so different. She suddenly became so conceited. I was really surprised by the way she talked to me and Jinnie the last time I saw her and the way she dressed... Totally different from what she used to be. She's changed.

And they say I've changed.

...And why the heck are random people who have never given a crap about my existence...suddenly trying to talk to me? I really don't care about them. They only cause pain.

...There's still that hole inside of me.

Sorry, I hate conceited people. I hate people who are always trying to act cute and trying really hard to get people's attention. I hate the kinds who are always being really nice to you but really, they don't really talk to you at all once their friends come strutting into the room.  I really don't like those who makes you feel like a total loser or idiot when they're the ones who had invited you in the first place; those who makes you feel like you don't belong anywhere; those who acts like they know you only when they need to look "good" and "nice" in front of others.

Geez, I'm not joining your circle; not because I don't like it, it's because I hate it: the lies, the fake masks, the hypocrisy, the gossip, everything...like your faces and such.

You all just embittered me.

...But the only ones who doesn't embitter me?

...I'll do almost anything for them.